Bible studies and Christian friends

I conduct a bible study every monday evening with a group of mostly old people. In this particular study, the topic is "how to handle offenses". I've found that this is a fairly common thing among Christians, because we all seem to have a hangup about being offended and needed to forgive.

But what amazes me is the fact that there seems to be a disconnect here with what I'm bringing to them. Scripture testifies that the promise of Christ includes actually is the starting point for handling everything that comes along in life, including being offended. Christ's death and blood brings both forgiveness of sins and cleansing from sins, by us receiving his word through study and prayer. The problem seems to be that I thought that this was how all Christians look at it. They seem to be believing the forgiveness part, but not the cleansing part.

Since I'm reformation, technically a confessing evangelical, each session of study I lead I remind the people of how God's law is good for instruction in righteousness, but God's law by itself gives no power whatsoever to keep the law. In the case of offenses, there's plenty in God's law telling how we are to handle being offended. But by itself, the law can do nothing for us.

I find that the disconnect comes when I show them the power itself through God's word. The Power of course isn't an "it", or "itself", but rather Jesus himself, given by God in his mercy as a propitiation for our sins, raised for our justification to work our sanctification by that same work on the cross. This is the gospel, and "the gospel (good news) is the power unto salvation for all who believe". That means that Jesus is our power, Jesus is our justification, and he is our sanctification. He's our everything. But when I tell of this, they seem to easily understand the forgiveness part, but the cleansing part they don't understand. "Yes", I tell them, "you must be taught how to handle offenses, but unless Jesus is the center and the reason you are handling them correctly in the first place, then its pretty much a useless endeavor on your part to even try". They always tell me after the session that I'm doing a wonderful job, but then tell my assistant afterwards that they don't understand.

They requested doing this whole thing because they perceive that they aren't being forgiving enough... In other words, they believe they aren't holy enough yet. They want to "do" better for God, or "gut it out for God", as on pastor I know likes to say, but they aren't trusting in the promises of God at all. They get the forgiveness part, but when it comes time to allow the Holy Spirit to convict us of transgressions and lead us to Christ, where we find the actual power to forgive offenses, they spend time saying, "well, I have to pray more", or "I have to calm down and take a breath" or "I will go now and anoint my office with oil and plead the blood over my job situation"... They talk about everything else but what Jesus has already done on our behalf.

They aren't receiving the second half of the promise. I don't know exactly what to do about it, other than say what I've already said in this post. I sometimes have moments where I want to act like Isaiah, and basically rain down fire on them, but I resist this temptation by God's grace. My only hope is in Jesus in this, that the Holy Spirit will work faith in them for this.